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July, 2005 July 14thI've always believed that a good artist is like a good lover - you can't be selfish. The audience/fans are your kings and queens and serving them is what should get you off. I'm not down with artistic masturbation.
Last night, for my 'dirty thirty' birthday, all my friends (the rockers) showed me just how unselfish they are. What they did for me was so genuine and beautiful I almost started to cry - but dammit, I cried enough on TV already! Haha! Besides not being with my mother and not having my father be able to physically wish me a happy birthday, I'd say turning 30 has been as close to perfect as it could be.
Being around talented artists who are all so full of love is the best birthday gift I could ask for. I know my father was with me all day and I was happy I was able to talk to my mom who is my rock. She is a strong woman and I admire her tremendously. If there is one thing I learned from my birthday is this: No matter how dark things may seem, there is always light - and the more attention you pay to that light - the brighter it gets. July, 2005 Rock Star:INXSA year ago I fantastically managed to over-analyze everything in my life. You know the typical self-indulgent artistic questions like "Am I crazy?; Where is my life going?; Why didn't I get my break yet?; Why is music so important to me?" blah, blah, blah. Sometimes we can love something so much that we unknowingly suffocate it and push it away. I got sick and tired of being sick and tired so I cried out for help and threw my hands up in a surrender of sorts asking for signs to guide me, no matter how obscure or obvious they may be. Long story short: those signs led me to LA. I moved out here only 5 months ago and everything has fallen into place. I surrendered to the magic of life instead of trying to control it and figure it out. Sometimes, we don't need to know why the rose blooms, we just need to smell it, appreciate it and move on our merry little way. I am part of that school of artists that wants to bring light and hope with music. I have NO idea what the next few months will bring and you know what? I like it that way. All I know is I am 200% ready for all of it and I welcome it with open arms- the good, the bad, the ugly and the insatiable. I will wear my heart on my sleeve and show you all the sides of me, no matter how close the sharks may swim. I believe true rock stars know when to be vulnerable and inspire and also know when to shut the hell up and have a good time. With that being said, these next few months will be a motley mix of gut-wrenching moments induced by pure love and drive along with scooby-doo moments induced by the power of the inner geek.
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